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BUT HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO PROVE SHIT TO YOU IF YOU WON’T EVEN TALK TO ME OR SEE ME?

Freshman year, I went through the breakup of a lifetime: the loss of a first love. There’s nothing quite like it. I went off the edge, drank myself into oblivion every night, and found someone to numb the pain. But I had no idea that someone would end up being my everything a few years later.

Things have been so complicated throughout our whole relationship, and I made a lot of mistakes. I hurt you too many times, and I really wish I didn’t. I took for granted that you were always there even after all the things I did. And now I don’t know if I’ll ever get you back. 

I thought I knew breakup pain. I thought nothing could be worse than losing your first love. I was wrong. This was a different love. It grew out of pain and loss, out of lust and confusion. And it became stronger because of that. I feel completely lost, and I’m worried about myself. Scared of what I might do. 

I want nothing more than to be with you. I know now, 100% that this is what I want. I know that I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone or anything else. Everything I want is in you, and I can’t picture my life without you. This time is different. I know that I fucked up, and I want to spend every day from here on out making up for it. If you would just give me the chance.